Everyone has a shirt that we like wearing too much
his shirt 😍
Shut the fuck up
- friend who lives hundreds of miles away: i made food
- me: can i have some
Time flows in a strange way on Sundays.
the phrase “curiosity killed the cat” is actually not the full phrase it actually is “curiosity killed the cat but satisfaction brought it back” so don’t let anyone tell you not to be a curious little baby okay go and be interested in the world uwu
so my school serves hot chocolate in these cups
and i noticed the two women seemed to be scrutinizing something
so i turned the cup and found this guy
and i laughed so hard because i can only imagine the situation this cup is depicting
"pardonnez-moi, but are you two french because madayum’”
"look we’re not interested"
"my contents may be hot"
My friend is embarrassed and thinks she’s the only one and I said id prove her wrong.
Especially when my wife is out of…
I have a large floppy-eared dog that I am dependent on to sleep now, because when I was a freshman and my dormitory was right by the street and everything was noisy at night I would sleep with the dog on my head to block out the noise. Now I actually can’t sleep without the dog on my head, even when it’s dead quiet.
do you ever have those friends you just REALLY FUCKING appreciate. like god DAMN i really fucking apprecIATE YOU. thank you for fucking existing. thanks for fucking finding me worthy of you. i usually words like frick but you just make me go FUCK. FUck fuck thank you